Obvi just jelly cuz I speak in abbrevz

I'm sitting on an obscenely comfortable red couch in the Hogwartzeh Doheny Library (here at the scenic University of Southern California, TELL 'EM WHAT THEY'VE WON, BOB), watching the sun go down through the stained glass windows.
May I just say?

Sometimes, when you've figured out a way to temporarily ignore your "priorities"
and "responsibilities"
and "children",
life is gorgeous without you having to do anything to it at all.

Y'know. Just looky no touchy.
It's like Cinnabuns.
You can just smell it and be fulfilled.
(...And then tear that shit up with yo' mouf)
(...This concludes my greatest figurative food-to-life parallel to date)

------------------------------------------------------------------------

ANYWAY.
What I really wanted to do is pop my head in a give you a lil' quiz.
Cause it's midterm season and I'm feelin' sadistic.

Complete the sentence with the appropriate phrase:

Life is like a bag of phallic lighthouse gummies.
You never know what you're gonna...

A. find in the parking lot of your local WalMart
B. need to stay warm while you get beamed up, Scotty
C. give as a gift at Darth Vader & PacMan's baby shower
D. USE YOUR NEWFOUND POWER OF 400 BABIES! ....FOR.

You have twelve minutes.
Starting eleven minutes ago.

Hint: No.